I have been on some rough roads but I am still smiling!!! I am very thankful to have the fantastic doctors and their fabulous staff trying to get me straightened around!!! My Meniere's Disease has been acting up more than usual...It typically does this time of year. I used to love Fall and Winter...All of the beautiful colors, the leaves falling to the ground, and the snow falling. Now, those same sights that I used to love now torment me. Even riding in the car and the shadows showing through the trees are tormenting. I usually cover my head and keep my eyes closed tight. It is a good thing I very seldom drive now because I can't drive with my eyes closed. lol Shopping is tortuous too especially when the stores change things around. They will be doing a lot of that over the next few months with the Holidays just around the corner. I am very thankful my family does my shopping or goes with me.
I do love the Holidays!!! The wonderful smells of Thanksgiving and Christmas baking!!! Yummy!!! I especially love being with family and friends who I don't see often because of the miles that separate us and everyone is off doing their daily routines.
Take care everyone and lots of blessings and love to you!!!
Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Sunday, September 22, 2013
Loving Memories
Memories...How sweet that word is to me! Everything I have been
through over the last 19 months, I have forgotten some things but the
most fulfilling memories I can remember...even tastes and smells. Many
years ago, I was given a personality test. When the results were given
to me, the examiner told me he has never seen such a strong S
(sensitive) person in his life! Anything that has to do with
taste, sight, smell, touch, and hearing is amplified with me. My senses
are what drives me. If something appeals to 1 of my senses, I embrace
it wholeheartedly. The opposite is also true. If something doesn't appeal
to my senses, I push it away...like a gross picture and I am deeply hurt if
something negative is said to me. I dislike the word ha*e. I don't
even like to spell it. Ha*e is such a strong word. I am very thankful
the appealing things happen a lot more than the other. The love I feel,
I truly feel. Someone once told me it is impossible to love all the
things I love. There are different types of love....There is the love I
have for my family and friends, the mother's love I have for my sons,
the love I have for my animals, the love I have for certain foods, the
love I have for Christmas, and the love I have for God. It is so much
easier to love!!!
The most precious memories I have are those of Kurtis and Kyle growing up. I can still hear their laughter and see their smiles!!!
Good night, sweet dreams, and God bless!!!
Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
The most precious memories I have are those of Kurtis and Kyle growing up. I can still hear their laughter and see their smiles!!!
Good night, sweet dreams, and God bless!!!
Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Lost Loved Ones
This post I am dedicating to those who have lost loved ones, present company included. I don't know why some of us are sent back and others are kept....maybe it is the physical pain here on earth that is too great to bear. What I do know is on the other side, there is no more pain, just a NEVER ending love!!! A love so powerful that it is so hard to leave!!! When I was there, I didn't want to come back but His assurance gave me all the peace I needed. When my time comes, as it eventually will, I do NOT want people grieving for me. I know there will be pain for those who are left behind but one day we will be together with those we have lost here on earth. PLEASE remember that!!! Life is too short here on earth to be grieving all the time. I know it hurts when a loved one is gone. Just ask yourself these questions, "How will my loved ones want me to be? Will they want me mourning all the time?" I know my answer is I want my loved ones to be happy and I do not want them mourning. Death hurts but it is for us who are left behind that it hurts the most.
When my dear friend Thelma passed away on May 4, 2009, I wept uncontrollably. We had gotten so close in the last 8 years of her life. We were neighbors since 1984. She was like a grandmother to me and 1 of my closest friends. She was nicknamed the Cat Lady and I was her accomplice and she recruited me into politicking too. She had so much spunk in her and lived life to its fullest! When she passed away at home, even the cats and dog grieved for her. They sat beside the couch where she laid and I could see the sadness in their eyes. When they came to take her body, Moe jumped on the stretcher and refused to move. I had to pick him up and hold him. The day of her grave side service, I was 1 of the pallbearers. It was something I felt deep inside me that I had to do. It started to be a gloomy day, just as sad as my heart was feeling. When the pastor started speaking, the sun broke through the clouds and was shining so bright and the birds were singing. Warmth and comfort overcame me as if gentle arms were holding me close. I spoke with others after the service and they felt the warmth and comfort too. It is that warmth and comfort I send out to all of you!!! Please don't be afraid to keep loving. We are meant to love one another. Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!!
Smile and laugh often, love ALWAYS!!!
When my dear friend Thelma passed away on May 4, 2009, I wept uncontrollably. We had gotten so close in the last 8 years of her life. We were neighbors since 1984. She was like a grandmother to me and 1 of my closest friends. She was nicknamed the Cat Lady and I was her accomplice and she recruited me into politicking too. She had so much spunk in her and lived life to its fullest! When she passed away at home, even the cats and dog grieved for her. They sat beside the couch where she laid and I could see the sadness in their eyes. When they came to take her body, Moe jumped on the stretcher and refused to move. I had to pick him up and hold him. The day of her grave side service, I was 1 of the pallbearers. It was something I felt deep inside me that I had to do. It started to be a gloomy day, just as sad as my heart was feeling. When the pastor started speaking, the sun broke through the clouds and was shining so bright and the birds were singing. Warmth and comfort overcame me as if gentle arms were holding me close. I spoke with others after the service and they felt the warmth and comfort too. It is that warmth and comfort I send out to all of you!!! Please don't be afraid to keep loving. We are meant to love one another. Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!!
Smile and laugh often, love ALWAYS!!!
Nobody's Perfect
We all make mistakes...That is why we are humans and not machines. Heaven knows I have made more than my share of them. I was talking with someone dear to my heart and she said she wished she would have done things different. I wish I would have done some things different too but we can't live our lives with "would haves, could haves, and should haves". The best we can do is ask for forgiveness and go on living in a positive way helping and loving others. To forgive someone is to give up resentment of or claim to requital for, to cease to feel resentment against (an offender). When you forgive someone, you don't keep reminding them of what they had done to hurt you. I held resentment for years until that glorious May 11th day! I know I am not perfect but I try my best to make others smile and laugh. I hold no resentments now and I feel so much better!
There is only ONE PERFECT person who was on earth and He died on the cross for us!!!
Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
There is only ONE PERFECT person who was on earth and He died on the cross for us!!!
Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
What A Weekend
I spent the weekend in the hospital. I was having problems catching my breath, there was a sharp pain shooting through my back, pain going down my left arm, and pain in my left sciatica going down to my toes. I was put in the new observation room. I had fantastic and smiling nurses, techs, and aides!!! 1 of the techs, every time he heard me move, he was in the room like lightening asking if I was ok and if he could get me something. He quickly learned I loved crushed ice and he always made sure I had plenty while he was there. :) Lots of lab work was drawn, EKGs were done, and a MRI with contrast was done. 1 of the techs who performed the MRI said I was the easiest she had done all night. I smiled and told her that was because I was sleeping. I have had so many that I usually sleep through them. They were all laughing and smiling....just how we are supposed to be!!! :) The EKGs and blood work didn't show any signs of a heart attack. The MRI showed some disk spaces were lower in height on some of them on the left but nothing requiring surgery. I was given prednisolone (If you ever have to take this, put honey on them and chase them with water and they go right down without the nasty taste.) flexeril, and a mild pain killer to take and was dismissed.
When I initially tell someone I have 3 cerebral anuerysms, their first reaction is I'm so sorry! I tell them please do not feel sorry for me! The way I feel now since that miraculous May 11th day is totally amazing!!! Do you remember as a child how you felt when Christmas and the day of your birthday arrived? Combine ALL of that happiness together....I feel like that EVERY day!!! I wouldn't trade May 11th or the rest of my journey for the world!!!
Smile and laugh often, love ALWAYS!!!
When I initially tell someone I have 3 cerebral anuerysms, their first reaction is I'm so sorry! I tell them please do not feel sorry for me! The way I feel now since that miraculous May 11th day is totally amazing!!! Do you remember as a child how you felt when Christmas and the day of your birthday arrived? Combine ALL of that happiness together....I feel like that EVERY day!!! I wouldn't trade May 11th or the rest of my journey for the world!!!
Smile and laugh often, love ALWAYS!!!
 |
| No one knows how much pain I am in because the happiness I have in my heart ALWAYS shines through! Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!! |
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
9-11 The Day Everyone Will Always Remember
I can remember the day The Twin Towers were destroyed and thousands of lives were changed forever. It was 12 years ago. I was in the waiting room at the chiropractor. The news report came on and the video of the 2 airplanes flying into The Twin Towers was shown. My heart sank and I started crying. How could anyone do such a horrendous thing?!!!
Four passenger airliners were hijacked by 19 al-Qaeda terrorists so they could be flown into buildings in suicide attacks. Two of those planes, American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175, were crashed into the North and South towers, respectively, of the World Trade Center complex in New York City. Within two hours, both towers collapsed with debris and the resulting fires causing partial or complete collapse of all other buildings in the WTC complex, as well as major damage to ten other large surrounding structures. A third plane, American Airlines Flight 77, was crashed into the Pentagon (the headquarters of the United States Department of Defense), leading to a partial collapse in its western side. The fourth plane, United Airlines Flight 93, was targeted at Washington, D.C., but crashed into a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania after its passengers tried to overcome the hijackers. In total, almost 3,000 people died in the attacks, including the 227 civilians and 19 hijackers aboard the four planes. It also was the deadliest incident for firefighters in the history of the United States. This information is from Wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/September_11_attacks
I remember the multitudes of flags being flown and The United States joining together as one nation under God to help anyway they could. Many blessings and lots of love to ALL!!! Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
The link below is for the song Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue. It is a 9/11 Tribute.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KsnLaXhq6Q
Faith, Hope, and Love are what He gave us...The Greatest Is Love
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AW8puRqE4Sc
Four passenger airliners were hijacked by 19 al-Qaeda terrorists so they could be flown into buildings in suicide attacks. Two of those planes, American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175, were crashed into the North and South towers, respectively, of the World Trade Center complex in New York City. Within two hours, both towers collapsed with debris and the resulting fires causing partial or complete collapse of all other buildings in the WTC complex, as well as major damage to ten other large surrounding structures. A third plane, American Airlines Flight 77, was crashed into the Pentagon (the headquarters of the United States Department of Defense), leading to a partial collapse in its western side. The fourth plane, United Airlines Flight 93, was targeted at Washington, D.C., but crashed into a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania after its passengers tried to overcome the hijackers. In total, almost 3,000 people died in the attacks, including the 227 civilians and 19 hijackers aboard the four planes. It also was the deadliest incident for firefighters in the history of the United States. This information is from Wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/September_11_attacks
I remember the multitudes of flags being flown and The United States joining together as one nation under God to help anyway they could. Many blessings and lots of love to ALL!!! Laugh and smile often, love ALWAYS!!!
The link below is for the song Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue. It is a 9/11 Tribute.
Faith, Hope, and Love are what He gave us...The Greatest Is Love
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AW8puRqE4Sc
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Way Back
My medical problems started on December 21, 1989 when a faulty machine guard gave way and hit me on top of the head with such force I felt like my head was pushed down between my shoulders and I could feel the pain go all the way down my spine! Everything went black. I literally saw all different colored stars. I asked a fellow employee if she saw what happened and she said No. I called my supervisor and she said, Great!!! The company had just been bought!!! I was shocked that she seemed more concerned about that than my well being. I had severe migraines. I went to the doctor and x-rays were done of my neck. They showed nothing. I was given pain killers...600mg 4x a day. My youngest son was only 10 months old. The migraines continued EVERY day. Several more x-rays were done of my neck and head. They revealed nothing. I was eventually told it was all in my head but still given pain killers. Uuugghh!!! I went to a chiropractor and he cracked my neck which gave me instant relief but the relief didn't last long. I was having adjustments done every other day. Periodically, I could feel my left sciatica hurting a lot. It got to the point where the chiropractic adjustments weren't helping. I was still told the migraines were all in my head and pain meds were given.
In 2005 I went to an orthopedic doctor because I was having problems with my left shoulder. He noticed I was holding my neck and was having a hard time turning my head. He asked me what was wrong with my neck and I told him I didn't know. I had migraines and my neck hurt since December 21, 1989. He told me x-rays were in order. I told him they wouldn't show anything because none of them had over the years. He told me they had to be done for insurance reasons. The x-rays were done and he came back in the room and told me I was right. They showed nothing. He then asked me if I ever had a MRI. I said no and he said I needed one asap! The MRI showed the disk between C3-C4 was crushed! I told him for years I was told the pain was all in my head. He laughed and told me, "It isn't in your head. It is in your neck!" I love a doctor with a sense of humor! I needed surgery. I was sent to a neurologist (not the one I have now) and he said as long as I was walking, talking, and breathing on my own, he was NOT going to do surgery because it was too risky. I could become a quadriplegic or die! I was referred to 2 other neurosurgeons and was told the same thing. In late 2007 I went back to the orthopedic doctor for my shoulder. He noticed I was still holding my neck and having problems turning my head. He asked if we had found a neurosurgeon and I said No...Silly them didn't want to make me a quadriplegic or kill me. He looked at me and said they had just gotten an orthopedic doctor in their practice who specializes in spinal injuries. He asked if I would be willing to see him. Of course I would see him! The worse he would tell me is No...not like I hadn't heard that before! lol
That orthopedic doctor looked at my MRI and asked when did I want to have surgery? I was so surprised! I told him after the holidays. The day before my surgery, I had an appointment with him. He told me the risks of surgery...I could possibly be a quadriplegic or die. I told him if he made me a quadriplegic, he better finish the job because I would not do that to my family and friends and it would not be fair to me to live like that. I also told him, he would not let any of that happen! I also sent 3 thank you cards....1 for my primary care physician who I had for a few years (I stopped going to the 1 who told me the pain was all in my head) because on a moment's notice I could call his office when the migraines were so excruciating I couldn't stand it and he would give me a shot to relieve the pain, 1 for the orthopedic doctor who found my problem, and 1 for the orthopedic doctor doing the surgery. I wrote in them, "Win, lose, or draw, I know you done your best!!!" I also thanked each one for the special things they done for me. Surgery was done January, 2008. The moment I woke up from surgery, the migraines were gone! Praise God!!!
They say the human body can only feel 1 major pain at a time, boy do I know that! After my migraines were gone, the pain in my left sciatica was showing itself big time! If I squatted down to pick something up, I had to pull myself up...I didn't have the strength in my legs to stand. When I went in for 1 of my check ups for my neck, I told the orthopedic doctor. He ordered x-rays of my lumbar vertebrates. Nothing. A MRI was then ordered. It showed S1 was crushed by L5! Another surgery was in order. I was told since S1 had been crushed for so long, it probably would never rejuvenate. Surgery was done in August, 2008. My sciatica still hurt so I started seeing a fantastic pain management doctor. He done a series of injections in my sciatica and finally I had relief!
I am paying for that work related accident physically and financially big time!!! Worker's Comp in Ohio closed my case. When I called and told them the correct tests were finally done and what they showed, I was told Too bad! It wasn't my fault MRIs were not done in 1989! If you feel something is wrong and a doctor tells you it is all in your head, go to another one and another one and another one til you find the right one!!! If you get hurt at work, report it and seek medical help immediately no matter what the company says!!! It is YOUR body and YOU are the one who will pay physically and financially if you don't keep seeking help NOT them!!!
Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!!
In 2005 I went to an orthopedic doctor because I was having problems with my left shoulder. He noticed I was holding my neck and was having a hard time turning my head. He asked me what was wrong with my neck and I told him I didn't know. I had migraines and my neck hurt since December 21, 1989. He told me x-rays were in order. I told him they wouldn't show anything because none of them had over the years. He told me they had to be done for insurance reasons. The x-rays were done and he came back in the room and told me I was right. They showed nothing. He then asked me if I ever had a MRI. I said no and he said I needed one asap! The MRI showed the disk between C3-C4 was crushed! I told him for years I was told the pain was all in my head. He laughed and told me, "It isn't in your head. It is in your neck!" I love a doctor with a sense of humor! I needed surgery. I was sent to a neurologist (not the one I have now) and he said as long as I was walking, talking, and breathing on my own, he was NOT going to do surgery because it was too risky. I could become a quadriplegic or die! I was referred to 2 other neurosurgeons and was told the same thing. In late 2007 I went back to the orthopedic doctor for my shoulder. He noticed I was still holding my neck and having problems turning my head. He asked if we had found a neurosurgeon and I said No...Silly them didn't want to make me a quadriplegic or kill me. He looked at me and said they had just gotten an orthopedic doctor in their practice who specializes in spinal injuries. He asked if I would be willing to see him. Of course I would see him! The worse he would tell me is No...not like I hadn't heard that before! lol
That orthopedic doctor looked at my MRI and asked when did I want to have surgery? I was so surprised! I told him after the holidays. The day before my surgery, I had an appointment with him. He told me the risks of surgery...I could possibly be a quadriplegic or die. I told him if he made me a quadriplegic, he better finish the job because I would not do that to my family and friends and it would not be fair to me to live like that. I also told him, he would not let any of that happen! I also sent 3 thank you cards....1 for my primary care physician who I had for a few years (I stopped going to the 1 who told me the pain was all in my head) because on a moment's notice I could call his office when the migraines were so excruciating I couldn't stand it and he would give me a shot to relieve the pain, 1 for the orthopedic doctor who found my problem, and 1 for the orthopedic doctor doing the surgery. I wrote in them, "Win, lose, or draw, I know you done your best!!!" I also thanked each one for the special things they done for me. Surgery was done January, 2008. The moment I woke up from surgery, the migraines were gone! Praise God!!!
They say the human body can only feel 1 major pain at a time, boy do I know that! After my migraines were gone, the pain in my left sciatica was showing itself big time! If I squatted down to pick something up, I had to pull myself up...I didn't have the strength in my legs to stand. When I went in for 1 of my check ups for my neck, I told the orthopedic doctor. He ordered x-rays of my lumbar vertebrates. Nothing. A MRI was then ordered. It showed S1 was crushed by L5! Another surgery was in order. I was told since S1 had been crushed for so long, it probably would never rejuvenate. Surgery was done in August, 2008. My sciatica still hurt so I started seeing a fantastic pain management doctor. He done a series of injections in my sciatica and finally I had relief!
I am paying for that work related accident physically and financially big time!!! Worker's Comp in Ohio closed my case. When I called and told them the correct tests were finally done and what they showed, I was told Too bad! It wasn't my fault MRIs were not done in 1989! If you feel something is wrong and a doctor tells you it is all in your head, go to another one and another one and another one til you find the right one!!! If you get hurt at work, report it and seek medical help immediately no matter what the company says!!! It is YOUR body and YOU are the one who will pay physically and financially if you don't keep seeking help NOT them!!!
Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!!
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Answered Prayers In Outstanding Ways!!!
I always believed God answered prayers in His way. The fantastic experience I had on May 11, 2012 is so surreal!!! I prayed to God to bring someone in my life who experienced the NEVER ending love like I did...Not that I wanted anyone to die but to share their experience with me.
One day, we were doing some errands. We were driving by CVS pharmacy and I noticed a group of people standing in front of the store. I asked Greg to please take me down there. He asked Why and I said because I am nosey. LOL
It was a bake sale for a young woman who was diagnosed with Stage 4 cervical cancer. She has 2 young sons. I told her father about my miraculous May 11 day. He said he could see something special was different with me when I walked up. I had this over whelming feeling to tell him something. I told him to please hug his daughter and tell her everything will be alright. He smiled and said Ok. His wife walked up at the end of our conversation. He introduced me to her and I recognized her as a former classmate. I proceeded to tell her about that remarkable day. She told me their daughter couldn't smell or taste because of her treatments. I had the over whelming feeling again to tell her to please hug her daughter and tell her everything will be alright. She said she would. I was about to leave and her cell phone alert went off. It was a text message from their daughter. She read it to me....It said, "A group of boys walked by and they smelled terrible!" She ran around the table with tears in her eyes and gave me the biggest hug!!! She said, "Thank you!!!"
I was crying too and told her, "Please don't thank me. Thank God!!!"
She nodded yes.
I saw them at our class reunion August 10. 2013. I asked how their daughter was doing. They smiled and I was told she is in remission!!!
WOW!!!
When I got back to the van, my middle sister and her husband was talking with Greg. They told us there was a church bazaar and they were serving lunch. They had shredded chicken sandwiches. I am such a sucker for shredded chicken sandwiches!!! I did not have lunch yet so Greg took me to the church. He gave me some money to put in the donation basket. When I walked in the church, I could feel how much love was there!!! They were serving sloppy joe sandwiches too...another favorite! I decided to get 1 of each. Yummy! As the lady handed me the wrapped sandwiches, I smiled and told her, "God is very happy."
She grabbed my arms and looked at me with tears in her eyes. She said, "You know about the NEVER ending love don't you?!"
I started crying and exclaimed, "Yes! I do!" Another WOW!!! I always describe the love as NEVER ending!!! We were crying and hugging! We told each other our miraculous stories. She told me she had lost her best friend a few months ago. She asked me if I would be her friend. I looked at her and said, "Of course I will be!!! I prayed for you!!!" We are now friends and every time we see each other of course it is hugs and tears of joy!!!
Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!!
One day, we were doing some errands. We were driving by CVS pharmacy and I noticed a group of people standing in front of the store. I asked Greg to please take me down there. He asked Why and I said because I am nosey. LOL
It was a bake sale for a young woman who was diagnosed with Stage 4 cervical cancer. She has 2 young sons. I told her father about my miraculous May 11 day. He said he could see something special was different with me when I walked up. I had this over whelming feeling to tell him something. I told him to please hug his daughter and tell her everything will be alright. He smiled and said Ok. His wife walked up at the end of our conversation. He introduced me to her and I recognized her as a former classmate. I proceeded to tell her about that remarkable day. She told me their daughter couldn't smell or taste because of her treatments. I had the over whelming feeling again to tell her to please hug her daughter and tell her everything will be alright. She said she would. I was about to leave and her cell phone alert went off. It was a text message from their daughter. She read it to me....It said, "A group of boys walked by and they smelled terrible!" She ran around the table with tears in her eyes and gave me the biggest hug!!! She said, "Thank you!!!"
I was crying too and told her, "Please don't thank me. Thank God!!!"
She nodded yes.
I saw them at our class reunion August 10. 2013. I asked how their daughter was doing. They smiled and I was told she is in remission!!!
WOW!!!
When I got back to the van, my middle sister and her husband was talking with Greg. They told us there was a church bazaar and they were serving lunch. They had shredded chicken sandwiches. I am such a sucker for shredded chicken sandwiches!!! I did not have lunch yet so Greg took me to the church. He gave me some money to put in the donation basket. When I walked in the church, I could feel how much love was there!!! They were serving sloppy joe sandwiches too...another favorite! I decided to get 1 of each. Yummy! As the lady handed me the wrapped sandwiches, I smiled and told her, "God is very happy."
She grabbed my arms and looked at me with tears in her eyes. She said, "You know about the NEVER ending love don't you?!"
I started crying and exclaimed, "Yes! I do!" Another WOW!!! I always describe the love as NEVER ending!!! We were crying and hugging! We told each other our miraculous stories. She told me she had lost her best friend a few months ago. She asked me if I would be her friend. I looked at her and said, "Of course I will be!!! I prayed for you!!!" We are now friends and every time we see each other of course it is hugs and tears of joy!!!
Many blessings and lots of love to ALL of you!!!
 |
| My hair is growing! I take at least 5,000 mcgs (5mgs) of Biotin a day. It is great for hair, skin, and nails. |
Mercy Me
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| I absolutely LOVE listening to Mercy Me!!! The songs in their 10 cd sound like they were made just for me!!! My favorite is "I Can Only Imagine" with The London Symphony....I don't have to imagine tho because I ALREADY know!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_O |
I had 1 of the plates removed from my head on December 21, 2012. Every time I done a facial expression, I had a pain where it was so my neurosurgeon decided to remove it. When I was in the OR, 1 of the nurses looked at me and said, "I remember YOU by your smile and laugh!!!" What a fantastic compliment!!!
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| December 21, 2012...1 of the plates is gone now. 1 of the screws had backed out causing me some discomfort whenever I had a facial expression. It is good now! |
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Here We Go Again!
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| I got my head shaved on August 8, 2012 and took my picture and posted it on Facebook. So many of my friends and family commented how happy I looked and I was told I had a glow about me! I can't think of a better compliment!!! |
August 10, 2012 I was scheduled for another crainiotomy. This one was to repair the one on the left side of my head. I decided to get my head shaved before surgery to save them a step and so I wouldn't have any "stragglers". LOL
Friday, August 10, 2012 arrived. I was not scared at all! I had so much peace!!! From the time I walked into the hospital until the time I left, the people who knew why I was there could not believe I was constantly smiling and laughing! I told them the story about that glorious May 11 day and then they knew...How could I be sad after that day!!!
My neurosurgeon saw me, marked my head where he was going to do the incision, pulled my big toe, winked at me, and told me he would see me in surgery. I was laughing!
One of the nurses came in and said my neurosurgeon would be in to see me shortly. I laughed and said he was already there and showed her my head where he had just marked it. She quickly grabbed another nurse to help get me prepped for surgery. She didn't want to keep the surgeon waiting. The anesthesiologist came in and asked if I needed anything to calm my nerves. I was still laughing and smiling! 1 of the nurses looked at him and said, "Does she LOOK like she needs anything?!"
He smiled and said, "Not at all!"
I was being wheeled to the OR....Still smiling and laughing! I had the nurses laughing at me! In the OR I was moved to the operating table. My arms were strapped down. I had everyone in the OR smiling and laughing! I remember a black mask coming towards my face and the anesthesiologist telling me he would see me when I woke up. Night, Night! :)
I woke up in recovery smiling and laughing...1 of the nurses told me I did NOT have surgery. I laughed and told her Yes I did because my head was bandaged and my right wrist was bandaged where they tapped into my artery to keep track of my blood pressure. She told me they couldn't find my surgeon to see why it was cancelled and my head was bandaged because I had staples in my head where they had my head pinned in the OR. I kept smiling and laughing! She asked me if she could bedazzle my bandages. I told her Sure! Go for it girlfriend! Most of the people were laughing in recovery then. :)
1 of the nurses picked up my paperwork and said, "Oh, No!!!"
I asked what was wrong. She said I was to be dismissed and they needed to keep me 1 night and take me room to room to cheer up everybody else because they don't get very many happy people in there! I told her if she could get it approved by my neurosurgeon, this chick was staying! They laughed! They couldn't find my surgeon so I was dismissed.
My cousin was taking me home from the hospital. We were on the interstate. She typically drives in the left lane but that day she was in the right lane. There were cables and posts running down between the east and west bound lanes. They were more over towards our side. We were in the west bound lane. It had been raining. A white pick up truck lost control in the east bound lane. If she would have had her window down she could have touched the hood on his truck!!! I looked up and said, "Thank you Angels!!!"
She smiled and looked at me and said they must work overtime looking after me! I smiled, laughed and said, "Yes, they do!!!"
On Sunday, my neurosurgeon called me. He asked how I was doing and I told him fabulous I just had to keep working on getting the anesthetic out of my system. I also told him I was a bit confused why I didn't have surgery. He said he had a gut wrenching feeling NOT to do my surgery...No matter how much he wanted to do it, he could NOT shake that feeling!!! I told him I respected him for listening to that feeling because every time I don't listen to it, something horrible goes wrong. He said the same thing happens to him. He also said he talked my case over with another neurosurgeon and he agreed surgery should NOT be done at that time because the aneurysm on the left is in the dominant hemisphere part of my brain and it is very deep. It is also very small. I laughed and told him we have to watch the 1 in the back of my head, we might as well watch that one too! He told me after he cancelled my surgery and everyone in the OR was looking at him like he was crazy, he walked out of the OR and his phone rang. It was for him to go perform a life saving procedure on someone else!!! Had he continued with my surgery, he would not have been free to do the other person's surgery! Every thing happens for a reason!!! I am the perfect example of that! :)
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| Ditto missed me even tho I was only gone for most of 1 day. I kept moving him off my arms and he would move back so he would know if I got up. I do believe he is smiling in his sleep! |
Rescues
One of my dear friends had puppies to give away and another dear friend wanted one so my middle sister and I took one to her. It was so fabulous to see her and her fiancee`!!!
SMILE AND LAUGH OFTEN, LOVE ALWAYS!!!
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| We were so happy we finally got to meet!!! |
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| I LOVE Dalmations!!! :) |
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| These 2 little guys were found along the road and brought to me. How could I say No to these cuties?! They were so sick I didn't think they were going to make it. Anything is possible when Love is there!!! |
Assurance..We All Need It At Some Point
It is funny the things I remember...There are a lot of things I have forgotten. I thank God the happiest times in my life I still remember...even the smells. The ghosts that have haunted me for so long are gone..For that I am extremely thankful! My short term memory isn't the greatest anymore. I wish everyone wore name tags because I am so embarrassed when I should know someone and I honestly can not remember their name. Some one told me I was the slowest person to respond to an online message. I told him if he had his head cracked open like a coconut he probably would be a little slow too. LOL He apologized. I told him No worries because everything I have been through that is how I honestly feel.
I remember coming home from the hospital the first time and I started crying because I couldn't remember how to play Farmville. I played it all the time. How could I have forgotten?! I called my oldest sister and she told me in an assured way I would remember in time! Sometimes we just need someone to tell us everything will be alright. :)
I remember coming home from the hospital the first time and I started crying because I couldn't remember how to play Farmville. I played it all the time. How could I have forgotten?! I called my oldest sister and she told me in an assured way I would remember in time! Sometimes we just need someone to tell us everything will be alright. :)
Monday, September 2, 2013
Out, Back In, And Out Again
I was in ICU for a few days. ALL of the nurses were so sweet!!! They always complimented me on how happy I was!!! I can't think of a better compliment!!! The day came for me to be released. I remember Kyle, my youngest son, taking me to Krogers so I could purchase some groceries. It was the first time the sun hit my bald head and the breeze blew gently over it. What a sense of freedom!!! I looked up at him and asked, "Why didn't you tell me this felt so good?! I would have shaved my head years ago!" He laughed and we continued into the store.
On May 17, 2012 I was readmitted to the hospital after only spending a couple days at home. I had so much pressure in my head! It was unbearable!!! Every time I bent over, sneezed, coughed, laughed, or took a deep breath in, I thought my head was going to explode!!! I was laughing all the time! My neurosurgeon wanted to see me ASAP and then he readmitted me right away. Med Team 1 was called in. I had numerous neurologists trying to figure out what was wrong. How blessed was I to have an entire TEAM!!! They ran blood work and CT scan. They feared I was having a cerebral fluid leak or bleed. They came to the conclusion I had a nasty infection and put me on high dose antibiotics and strong pain killers. They treated me so awesome!!!! They got my pain under control to where I didn't think my head was going to pop open. 1 of the nurses from ICU came up and saw me. She wanted to make sure I was being treated properly on the Brain and Stroke floor. How sweet was that?!!!
Funny how pain killers make you think. I was watching the news and a clip came on about people from all over Ohio who had adopted pets were meeting the next day to discuss their pet adoptions. 1 of my nurses came in and I told her I needed to get home so I could take my pet green iguana to the meeting. She looked at me funny and I told her, I DO have one! I opened up Ziggy's picture on my laptop and showed her. She laughed and grabbed another nurse to look at the pic! lol Needless to say, I was not well enough to be dismissed. Just as well because I was definitely in no condition to travel.
Several days later, I was dismissed. I was given high dose antibiotics to take for a month. At least the swelling was almost gone. Yeah!!!
This is my incision when I came home the second time from the hospital. My right eye is swollen because I had an allergic reaction to the adhesive tape. When I came home the first time, Moe, 1 of my cats, was trying to get the tape off my face. When I took the tape off, my eye was swollen shut. Moe knew it had to come off! Good job Moe! :)
There is A LOT more to my fabulous journey!!! Wait til you read it! I know, hurry and write it! lol Take care everyone!!!
On May 17, 2012 I was readmitted to the hospital after only spending a couple days at home. I had so much pressure in my head! It was unbearable!!! Every time I bent over, sneezed, coughed, laughed, or took a deep breath in, I thought my head was going to explode!!! I was laughing all the time! My neurosurgeon wanted to see me ASAP and then he readmitted me right away. Med Team 1 was called in. I had numerous neurologists trying to figure out what was wrong. How blessed was I to have an entire TEAM!!! They ran blood work and CT scan. They feared I was having a cerebral fluid leak or bleed. They came to the conclusion I had a nasty infection and put me on high dose antibiotics and strong pain killers. They treated me so awesome!!!! They got my pain under control to where I didn't think my head was going to pop open. 1 of the nurses from ICU came up and saw me. She wanted to make sure I was being treated properly on the Brain and Stroke floor. How sweet was that?!!!
Funny how pain killers make you think. I was watching the news and a clip came on about people from all over Ohio who had adopted pets were meeting the next day to discuss their pet adoptions. 1 of my nurses came in and I told her I needed to get home so I could take my pet green iguana to the meeting. She looked at me funny and I told her, I DO have one! I opened up Ziggy's picture on my laptop and showed her. She laughed and grabbed another nurse to look at the pic! lol Needless to say, I was not well enough to be dismissed. Just as well because I was definitely in no condition to travel.
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| Ziggy didn't mind me dressing her up. Notice she has a pet iguana herself! lol |
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| Mighty Moe |
Several days later, I was dismissed. I was given high dose antibiotics to take for a month. At least the swelling was almost gone. Yeah!!!
This is my incision when I came home the second time from the hospital. My right eye is swollen because I had an allergic reaction to the adhesive tape. When I came home the first time, Moe, 1 of my cats, was trying to get the tape off my face. When I took the tape off, my eye was swollen shut. Moe knew it had to come off! Good job Moe! :)
There is A LOT more to my fabulous journey!!! Wait til you read it! I know, hurry and write it! lol Take care everyone!!!
Game Plan And Game Played!
Before I was diagnosed with the cerebral aneurysms, I had so much pain in my heart how others had treated me in the past.
You know how some people can be cruel by things they say and do. I
prayed to God to PLEASE take all of the pain out of my heart...I
couldn't deal with it by myself any longer!!! We don't ask God how to
handle things, it is His way. He chose cerebral aneurysms with me.
Now, it was game plan time! 1 doctor wanted to perform a coiling procedure on the biggest cerebral aneurysm, the one on the right. My aneurysms have wide bases which don't make them good candidates for that procedure. The surgeon assured me he could do it. I asked what the percentage was for something to go wrong..not that I was being negative, just weird things happen to me. He said only about 7-10%. I told him that was too high for this chick! lol
My neurosurgeon suggested the clipping procedure. I agreed that would probably be the best solution. The craniotomy was performed on May 11, 2012. My head was shaved and my scalp was cut in a C starting at the right side of my forehead and going down past the bottom of my right ear. The scalp was peeled back and a section of my skull was removed. The aneurysm was found and clipped. The piece of skull was replaced and a small plate was put on each end to hold it in place. My scalp was placed back over the skull and stapled in place. A drainage tube was inserted too.
During my craniotomy, the most miraculous thing happened to me!!! I briefly died. There is such a NEVER ENDING LOVE on the other side!!! The Angels told me it wasn't my time and I had to come back. God told me He would deal with those who have treated me unjustly in the past and He has some of them already!!! He told me to be happy and He wants ALL of us, not just me to be happy and work together!!! He told me to tell others my story, so I do!!! When I woke up from my surgery, ALL the pain I had carried in my heart for so many years was completely gone and replaced with His NEVER ENDING LOVE!!! I smile and laugh EVERY day!!! I have a saying, Vengeance is Mine sayeth the Lord and if we are lucky, He lets us watch!!! lol
My new life motto became...Do NOT let anyone STEAL your happiness!!! Those who try are just miserable themselves. Do NOT let them win by stealing YOUR happiness!!!
I live like this EVERY day....LAUGH AND SMILE OFTEN...LOVE ALWAYS!!!
This is what I looked like when I woke up from surgery on that glorious May 11, 2012 day!!!
Now, it was game plan time! 1 doctor wanted to perform a coiling procedure on the biggest cerebral aneurysm, the one on the right. My aneurysms have wide bases which don't make them good candidates for that procedure. The surgeon assured me he could do it. I asked what the percentage was for something to go wrong..not that I was being negative, just weird things happen to me. He said only about 7-10%. I told him that was too high for this chick! lol
My neurosurgeon suggested the clipping procedure. I agreed that would probably be the best solution. The craniotomy was performed on May 11, 2012. My head was shaved and my scalp was cut in a C starting at the right side of my forehead and going down past the bottom of my right ear. The scalp was peeled back and a section of my skull was removed. The aneurysm was found and clipped. The piece of skull was replaced and a small plate was put on each end to hold it in place. My scalp was placed back over the skull and stapled in place. A drainage tube was inserted too.
During my craniotomy, the most miraculous thing happened to me!!! I briefly died. There is such a NEVER ENDING LOVE on the other side!!! The Angels told me it wasn't my time and I had to come back. God told me He would deal with those who have treated me unjustly in the past and He has some of them already!!! He told me to be happy and He wants ALL of us, not just me to be happy and work together!!! He told me to tell others my story, so I do!!! When I woke up from my surgery, ALL the pain I had carried in my heart for so many years was completely gone and replaced with His NEVER ENDING LOVE!!! I smile and laugh EVERY day!!! I have a saying, Vengeance is Mine sayeth the Lord and if we are lucky, He lets us watch!!! lol
My new life motto became...Do NOT let anyone STEAL your happiness!!! Those who try are just miserable themselves. Do NOT let them win by stealing YOUR happiness!!!
I live like this EVERY day....LAUGH AND SMILE OFTEN...LOVE ALWAYS!!!
This is what I looked like when I woke up from surgery on that glorious May 11, 2012 day!!!
NO Frowns and NO Tears Allowed!!!
By all means I want NO one to feel sorry for me!!! NO frowns and NO tears are allowed!!! Heaven knows I have shed a lot when I was first diagnosed with 1 cerebral aneurysm, let alone a total of 3. Look at my pic...Do I look unhappy? I most certainly am NOT!!! The journey I have been on has been the most INCREDIBLE thing I could EVER experience!!! The BEST is yet for me to write!!! It is truly MIRACULOUS!!! :)
Sunday, September 1, 2013
How It Began
On Feb 1, 2012 I was found unresponsive outside at work. Feb in Ohio is very cold. It is estimated I was outside for about 90 minutes. I was taken inside and First Response was called. I was told I was saying over and over, "I'm cold" and I kept hitting my left hand. I was then taken to the nurse at the regional distribution center where I worked. I was told my blood pressure was stroke level, my body core temp was 97 and she could tell by me answering in such few words that something was dangerously wrong with me. I was still hitting my hand. She told them to call the squad and take me to the hospital. I have at least 6 hours of memory loss for that night. My youngest son worked with me at the time and they let him go to the hospital with me. He said I drove all of the nurses and doctors crazy by saying "I'm cold!" When I came to, I had 9 blankets on me and I was still freezing!!! I was told they had no more blankets to put on me. I felt like a pop sickle! A CT scan was performed that night and all kinds of tests but they told me all they could come up with besides me being cold and my bp was my blood sugar level was low but I am not a diabetic. They gave me some sugary liquid to drink and dismissed me. I remember before I became unresponsive I had a severe headache that started at the right side of my head, went across my forehead, and behind my left eye. I still had that severe headache when I was dismissed.
Later, I called my neurologist and told them about my severe headache. They couldn't get me in for 2 weeks because he is the only neurologist in that city and is very busy. He did order a test to see if I was having seizures. It came back inconclusive. The reason I have a neurologist is almost 6 years ago I woke up and was so dizzy I couldn't walk. About 12 hours of not being able to walk, I was taken to the ER. They diagnosed me with a severe case of vertigo. I was given medication and told to follow up with my Primary Care Physician (PCP) which I did. I was then sent to physical therapy. I spent the next few months doing that. I got a little better but then it leveled off. I was sent to the Ear, Nose, and Throat (ENT) doctor. They diagnosed me with Benign Positional Vertigo (BPV). I was not getting better so I was later referred to a neurologist. He diagnosed me with Meniere's Disease. If someone has vertigo they usually have BPV or Meniere's Disease. I got double whammied. I have both. I can tell people I am dizzy and literally mean it! lol My neurologist prescribed medication to help alleviate the symptoms. I was still dizzy and had the ringing in my right ear but I could function to some degree and go back to work.
I went back to work a couple days after my incident. I still had the severe headache. Some of my co-workers told me I looked like I was dying when they took me out on the stretcher that Feb 1 night. I secretly cried because I never want anyone to see something like that.
The time came for me to see my neurologist. He noticed my left eye wasn't reacting as fast as my right eye. I have a MRI done once a year because I have a small tumor on my pituitary gland which causes my prolactin level to be high. I was having a menstrual cycle every other week even tho I only have one ovary. My neurologist prescribed Bromocriptine which lowered my prolactin level and stopped the menstrual bleeding. Thank God for that little white pill!!! He ordered a MRA. It checks blood vessels and arteries. That was performed the next morning. The MRA was done. By that afternoon my neurologist called and told me it found a Cerebral Aneurysm on the right and I needed a neurosurgeon. I was devastated!! I had an uncle who passed away in his late 40s from a cerebral aneurysm that ruptured. He was blind in his left eye. I was soon to be 47. You can imagine the terror going through my head!!! He suggested a neurosurgeon in the same city he was in. When I heard the name of the neurosurgeon, it didn't feel right in my heart. I called his office and they couldn't schedule me for MONTHS! I got on Facebook and messaged a dear former classmate. He is a doctor. His entire family are doctors or nurses. I told him what was happening and who he would suggest I see. He recommended me to a fabulous neurosurgeon near Columbus. As soon as I read his name, I felt in my heart he is who I needed to go to. I felt the whole world being lifted from my shoulders!!! I called his office and his "right hand" was so sweet and helpful! She told me to get my medical records faxed asap. She said if he couldn't help me, 1 of the neurosurgeons there could. I went from 1 neurosurgeon to an entire TEAM!!! How blessed was I!!! I got all of my neurological records faxed and got my cd and reports from the hospital for the MRIs, CT scan, and MRA to take to my neurosurgeon. The report for the CT scan done on Feb 1 said POSSIBLE cerebral aneurysm on the right!!! I was NOT told about that!!!
The day came for my appointment with my neurosurgeon. What a kind, caring, and gentle man!!! I loved his entire staff too!!! He could see how much pain I was in. He ordered a cerebral angiogram. A cerebral angiogram is performed by inserting a catheter through the femoral artery up to the brain and injecting dye on one side of the brain and taking pictures and then doing the same for the other side. When the left side was injected with dye, I felt the left side of my face cringe in pain! Several years ago, I was bit on the face by a brown recluse spider below my left eye. If I am stressed or tired, I still have pain from that bite. They think that is why I had so much pain on that side. One of the nurses ran her hand down my arm and told me everything would be ok. Before I left the hospital, the doctor told me I had 2 more cerebral aneurysms....1 on the left and 1 in the back of my head. My oldest sister was with me when I was told the news. I am so blessed to have loving siblings!!!
Later, I called my neurologist and told them about my severe headache. They couldn't get me in for 2 weeks because he is the only neurologist in that city and is very busy. He did order a test to see if I was having seizures. It came back inconclusive. The reason I have a neurologist is almost 6 years ago I woke up and was so dizzy I couldn't walk. About 12 hours of not being able to walk, I was taken to the ER. They diagnosed me with a severe case of vertigo. I was given medication and told to follow up with my Primary Care Physician (PCP) which I did. I was then sent to physical therapy. I spent the next few months doing that. I got a little better but then it leveled off. I was sent to the Ear, Nose, and Throat (ENT) doctor. They diagnosed me with Benign Positional Vertigo (BPV). I was not getting better so I was later referred to a neurologist. He diagnosed me with Meniere's Disease. If someone has vertigo they usually have BPV or Meniere's Disease. I got double whammied. I have both. I can tell people I am dizzy and literally mean it! lol My neurologist prescribed medication to help alleviate the symptoms. I was still dizzy and had the ringing in my right ear but I could function to some degree and go back to work.
I went back to work a couple days after my incident. I still had the severe headache. Some of my co-workers told me I looked like I was dying when they took me out on the stretcher that Feb 1 night. I secretly cried because I never want anyone to see something like that.
The time came for me to see my neurologist. He noticed my left eye wasn't reacting as fast as my right eye. I have a MRI done once a year because I have a small tumor on my pituitary gland which causes my prolactin level to be high. I was having a menstrual cycle every other week even tho I only have one ovary. My neurologist prescribed Bromocriptine which lowered my prolactin level and stopped the menstrual bleeding. Thank God for that little white pill!!! He ordered a MRA. It checks blood vessels and arteries. That was performed the next morning. The MRA was done. By that afternoon my neurologist called and told me it found a Cerebral Aneurysm on the right and I needed a neurosurgeon. I was devastated!! I had an uncle who passed away in his late 40s from a cerebral aneurysm that ruptured. He was blind in his left eye. I was soon to be 47. You can imagine the terror going through my head!!! He suggested a neurosurgeon in the same city he was in. When I heard the name of the neurosurgeon, it didn't feel right in my heart. I called his office and they couldn't schedule me for MONTHS! I got on Facebook and messaged a dear former classmate. He is a doctor. His entire family are doctors or nurses. I told him what was happening and who he would suggest I see. He recommended me to a fabulous neurosurgeon near Columbus. As soon as I read his name, I felt in my heart he is who I needed to go to. I felt the whole world being lifted from my shoulders!!! I called his office and his "right hand" was so sweet and helpful! She told me to get my medical records faxed asap. She said if he couldn't help me, 1 of the neurosurgeons there could. I went from 1 neurosurgeon to an entire TEAM!!! How blessed was I!!! I got all of my neurological records faxed and got my cd and reports from the hospital for the MRIs, CT scan, and MRA to take to my neurosurgeon. The report for the CT scan done on Feb 1 said POSSIBLE cerebral aneurysm on the right!!! I was NOT told about that!!!
The day came for my appointment with my neurosurgeon. What a kind, caring, and gentle man!!! I loved his entire staff too!!! He could see how much pain I was in. He ordered a cerebral angiogram. A cerebral angiogram is performed by inserting a catheter through the femoral artery up to the brain and injecting dye on one side of the brain and taking pictures and then doing the same for the other side. When the left side was injected with dye, I felt the left side of my face cringe in pain! Several years ago, I was bit on the face by a brown recluse spider below my left eye. If I am stressed or tired, I still have pain from that bite. They think that is why I had so much pain on that side. One of the nurses ran her hand down my arm and told me everything would be ok. Before I left the hospital, the doctor told me I had 2 more cerebral aneurysms....1 on the left and 1 in the back of my head. My oldest sister was with me when I was told the news. I am so blessed to have loving siblings!!!
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